I have a friend who had a Cockatiel. He knew the bird had "trust issues" when he bought her, but that didn't stop him from loving her. Her name was Babe. He later discovered that she had been abused by being hand slapped and, rightfully so, she didn't trust humans. Her experience with them so far in her life was that they were unpredictable and they hurt you and therefore they cannot be trusted.
My friend continuously and tirelessly loved Babe unconditionally. He spoke lovingly to her and he was patient and kind at all times. She continued to reject his love and at one point she even bit him so hard she pierced right through his skin. I can't remember if it was on his nose or his ear or someplace else, but you better believe that it smarted. Although she hurt him he maintained his vigilance and continued to patiently and unconditionally love her and draw her closer to him.
After consistently and unconditionally loving Babe for 5 months my friend had successfully managed to breakdown the wall of distrust and gain both her trust and her love. She would now come to him, stand on his finger, bow her head so he could give her a head scrub, sit on his shoulder and take food gently from his mouth. She even learned to say things like "love you, pretty bird, night night." Whenever a train went by she would say "choo choo." She gave him lots of kisses and she loved it when he played his guitar. In fact, she would sleep on his shoulder as he played. She was a special little girl. It was clear that Babe flourished in this loving environment. Through the experience of gaining her trust they developed a deep bond with each other.
One evening I received a frantic text message from my friend. While stepping outside through his back door Babe snuck out and flew away. It was dark out and he had no idea where she was. He waited outside for her until the morning and when the sun rose he found her perched up high in his neighbor's tree.
He did everything he could think of to coax her to come to him, back to where he could keep her safe and close. He brought out her cage and he talked to her. He sat under that tree and waited patiently for her to come back to him. He had done all that he could do for Babe, the rest was up to her.
As the sun set that evening unfortunately my friend watched helplessly and with a broken heart as Babe flew away and never returned. If any of you have ever welcomed a pet into your life and bonded with that pet you will understand how devastating it is to lose a feather or fur family member, especially in such a traumatic way as this. I certainly understood and felt his pain and loss.
Shortly after this happened the Holy Spirit revealed to me that sometimes this is how our Father God feels about us. When I saw that connection I was not only grieving with my friend over the loss of Babe, but I was also grieving with the Holy Spirit over this recent revelation. Like Babe, many of us have "trust issues." If we have lived on this earth for any length of time we soon discover that people can hurt us, lie to us, deceive us, abuse us, neglect us and reject us. We often concluded that NO ONE can be trusted and we build up this wall around our hearts in an effort to protect ourselves.
Unfortunately, when we put up a wall we not only keep everyone else out, but we keep ourselves isolated making it impossible to truly connect with anyone. We then realize it's pretty lonely behind this wall and we attempt to fill the gap with anything that will relieve the loneliness and isolation we feel. We might try people pleasing, the pursuit of money or fame, popularity, a certain degree or job title, drugs, alcohol, gambling, sexual promiscuity, partying, pornography, etc. Don't get me wrong, some of these things are good things to pursue, but if they are in an effort to make you feel happy or complete you will be disappointed when you reach that goal. We might be able to escape the feelings of isolation and loneliness for a short time, but they always come back.
In the meantime, none of that stops Father God from loving us. God is watching us, loving us and waiting with open arms for us to run to Him. Quite often when we conclude that no one can be trusted we include God and when we put that wall up we keep God out.
Some of us have had a cold, lifeless religion full of rules and regulations shoved down our throats and as a result thought, "If this is what it's all about I want no part of it" and we walk away. Jesus hated all of the man-made rules and regulations of the Pharisees. In fact he said:
