Ailing Father Prophesies His Funeral

In February 2016 an MRI revealed that my dad had a grade IV Glioblastoma brain tumor. It is the worst kind. His prognosis was not good and he was given approximately 6 months to live. My happy-go-lucky, extremely independent, healthy, hard-working, go-getting, 66-year-old dad who was still working full-time was changing before my very eyes. Every week when I went to visit him he was worse. My dad changed from this positive, upbeat, whistling everywhere he goes, joking around person to a tired, sad, depressed version of my dad. In a very short time he became paralyzed on his right side and wheelchair bound. Then he could no longer verbalize his thoughts. He could only say yes or no and even then sometimes when he said yes he meant no and vise versa. The dad I knew and loved was gone and what was left of him was only a shell of whom I had once known. Although he was still there in the flesh, I missed him terribly and my heart was breaking. 

My dad and I when he was perfectly healthy

I was always daddy's little girl. He would fly up north for work for a week and fly back home for a week. On his week back home I knew he was looking forward to seeing me (his little girl), and if I didn't show up soon I would hear from him or my mom with regards to the fact that he was looking forward to seeing me. When I would come over each week as his health, his independence and his physical body slowly declined, my mom told me he would "light up" when he saw me. I could no longer tell he was happy to see me, and he could no longer wrap his arms around me and squeeze me tight, so I treasure knowing that my mom could see him "light up." My mom worked extremely hard taking good care of him, loving him and keeping him comfortable at home until July 28, 2016, when he was taken by ambulance and admitted to Palliative care. 

 I took every opportunity to connect with my ailing father,

I'm holding the hand that was not paralyzed.

If only my love could have healed my dad

Up to this point I had a choice to make, I could blame God and ask, "why, God, why him?" OR I could realize that we live in a fallen, broken, decaying, temporary world. This earth is not heaven, far from it. Nothing on this earth will last forever. On this earth sickness, disease, sadness, decay, sin, evil and the devil run rampant. If I needed someone to blame and hate, it was going to be Satan. Instead, I chose to call on God for help and strength. I chose to trust God and lean on Him to help me through this extremely difficult situation. I felt His loving presence often throughout this ordeal and I still do.

In the early morning hours of July 31, 2016, I felt a strong urge to go see my dad at the hospital. I arrived at 12:30 a.m. His condition shocked me. His breathing was labored and rattling. He was unresponsive and unconscious. I was told his breathing was called the "death rattle." I hope I never have to hear that again as long as I live. It was brutal!

I placed my right hand on his head. I held my Bible in my left hand and read 2 Corinthians 4:7-11 and verses 16-18 as well as chapter 5:1-8. 

These pictures were taken from my Bible that I read to my dad that night

2 Corinthians 4:7-11 

2 Corinthians 4:16-18

2 Corinthians 5:1 and 2

2 Corinthians 5:3-8

My reading ended on page 1326 of my Bible. Earlier, in May 2016 I had done my very first Bible art journal entry. It's a butterfly and it stood for the verse found in 2 Corinthians 5:17

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; 

old things have passed away; 

behold, all things have become new. 

My dad loved butterflies and what they represent as a born-again Christian. If you read my previous blog entry titled, "The Butterfly Gift" you will understand better. Here is a link to my previous blog entry: 

http://living-waters-spring.blogspot.ca/2016_07_01_archive.html

My reading to dad ending on this page was not a coincidence, it was a GOD-incidence! 

I sat down beside my dad's bed and placed my hands on his left knee. My mom was also seated at his left side holding his hand. Two of my aunts (his sisters) were on his right side. He was surrounded by women who loved him deeply. I told him we would be OK and he could let go now. I told him he could go see his mom now. I placed my head down on his bed. My head rocked with every labored breath he took. At 2:00 a.m. my dad's spirit left his ailing body and he went to be with Jesus. I was right by his side when it happened. 

This was put up at the hospital shortly after my dad went to be with Jesus

I take great comfort in the fact that I know my daddy is in heaven and I will, one day, see him again. It was also comforting to know that God understood my heartache as He too watched His son Jesus suffer greatly and die on the cross to pay the penalty of the sins of all who choose to believe in Him. 

My dad's funeral was held on Friday, August 5, 2016. Some time earlier in July my mom had told me that dad had spoken almost a full sentence to her. Speaking a full sentence was something my dad could no longer do. On July 16 he said, "Three more weeks and then..." He never finished that sentence, but he was able to repeat it one more time. I believe God showed him how much time of suffering he had left on this earth before he would be freed from his ailing, paralyzed body and his funeral would take place. Perhaps he never finished the sentence because he didn't want to upset my mom, but in his own way he wanted to prepare her for what was about to take place. His funeral took place 20 days after he spoke those words, exactly 3 weeks later. 

 I can't wait to see you again daddy... until then I miss you so much!

My dad is even happier now with Jesus than he was in this picture with my mom

Every family member wore a butterfly pendant at my dad's funeral.

 This is the butterfly pendant I wore at my dad's funeral

This was the hardest blog post I have ever written. It's written from my broken heart and the wounds are still so fresh, but I felt the Lord leading me to share this. If it brings even one person hope, encourages one person, leads one person to Jesus, or provides some healing to a wounded soul, then revisiting these fresh wounds is so worth it. I believe God is using my pain to help others and in so doing my pain is not wasted.

Prophetic Baptism Vision Fulfilled

It was dusk on a warm, sunny, summer evening in 2010 and I was outside on my deck enjoying my time spiritually curled up in God’s lap. I had just finished spending some time reading from His love letter (the Bible) and I was pouring out to Him whatever was on my heart. Since approximately 2006 I had been feeling the desire and need to be baptised as I had never been. As I now fully comprehended what water baptism truly meant and out of my deep love and admiration for Jesus, I wanted to take this next step of faith. The only problem was that I was still suffering from varying degrees of panic disorder and the fear of all of the “what ifs” was weighing heavily on me, especially the “what if I had a panic attack” thought. My church had a baptism ceremony around 2006 and I really wanted to be a part of it, but fear and panic had overtaken my desire to be baptised.

Since then I had made a lot of progress in overcoming many fears and I had been venturing out to a lot more places and taking part in more activities that I had previously avoided. It was clear to me that my faith and confidence were growing. I cried out to God saying “please make a way for me to be baptised. What is the best way? Where should it happen?” I really wanted to be baptised outside in a body of water like how Jesus was baptised in the Jordan River. Since I had made it out for a holiday to Pike Lake the previous summer, I knew I could go that far so I thought perhaps Pike Like would be a good place to be baptised. It is part of the Saskatchewan River too so it would be even closer to how Jesus was baptised.

As I continued to cry out to God about my strong desire to be baptised wondering how and when and where it would happen, I began having a vision. Youth group was about to begin for the first year with myself and another young lady leading it in the fall. I saw myself hanging out at youth group. Then I saw myself talking to one of the girls from youth group. We were excited because we were both going to be baptised. I saw myself get baptised and she was baptised afterwards. That is where the vision ended. At that point I felt a knowing in my spirit that I needed to wait until the 2010-2011 youth group season ended. I knew that one of the young ladies from youth group was going to be baptised at the same time as me. I did not know which girl; I just knew it was a girl. After that of course I questioned whether that was just a daydream or if it was, in fact, a prophetic vision from God. I decided not to analyze it, but just wait and see what happens.

That winter after attending a membership class at church one morning, we had talked about baptism and I was all pumped up and excited about the idea of being baptised someday soon. I went upstairs and walked straight over to one of the girls from youth and said something like “have you ever been baptised” or “would you like to be baptised” or something like that, I cannot recall my exact words. Her name is Sierra. I had no idea why I said that because I had no intention of saying that when I walked up to her, it just came out. I had no idea if she had already been baptised or if she was even feeling the desire to be baptised.

A few more months passed and our pastor started talking about having a baptism service that summer. I had completely forgotten about the fact that I had mentioned getting baptised to Sierra from youth when I received a text message from her saying she was going to be baptised with me. As soon as I read that I remembered that vision I had the summer before youth group started. It was all coming together with the Holy Spirit’s help.

On September 18, 2011, I was finally baptised. It was not in the Saskatchewan River or in Pike Lake for that matter, but it was outdoors in a swimming pool and I made sure I brought a small vile of river water that I poured into the pool so I could say that I was baptised in river water just like Jesus. There were five of us that were baptised that day. She was baptised after me just like in my vision and she was the only one from youth group who was baptised that day.

Some of you might be thinking, well you mentioned baptism to Sierra and that is why it happened, but I beg to differ. Mentioning it and someone deciding they are ready to do it are two completely different things. This had the Holy Spirit’s work written all over it from the time I had the vision to the time Sierra was baptised after me.

I even shared a short part of my testimony which was optional and I am not a public speaker type. In part of my testimony I said:

“I have struggled with fear and panic for far too long. It has robbed me of relationships and caused me to distance myself from family members I was once very close to.

I believe sometimes God miraculously delivers a person, for example, from an addiction or an illness and sometimes Jesus meets you down in the pit you are in, takes you by the hand and walks you out. I believe Jesus is doing the latter for me and in the process I have been learning some valuable lessons along the way that I otherwise would not have learned as Jesus walks me out of that pit one step at a time. I am not where I need to be yet, but I thank God I am not where I used to be.

It is that same crippling fear that has kept me from being baptized in accordance with and in obedience to God’s Word, but not anymore. I will no longer be mastered by anything but Jesus.”

If you were to ask me if I felt any fear as I shared my testimony and got baptised and my reply to you would be “you better believe it,” and you know what, I felt the fear but I also made the choice not to obey those fickle feelings and instead I pushed through them in faith with Jesus and sweet little Sadie (my new best friend) by my side. Sadie is a sweet little girl who was glued to my side that whole time. She was my little angel that God sent to me to share that very memorable moment in my life.